Do I Need A Morning Routine Afterall- What Is My Purpose
Mornings are the toughest part o the day for me, see earlier post. As of late I actually hate the mornings, waking up from my dream state is the nightmare that I wish I had while I was asleep so waking up wasn’t that bad.
I have gone back and forth between having a morning routine, not having a routine, believing in the power of the morning routine, to thinking they are absolute bullshit.
I am 41 years old and I am more confused about life than ever before.
From the outside I am in a great place, I have an amazing family, I new job that is currently causing me stress but I have literally been here almost 2 months so I am right where I should be with that, a roof over my head, clothes on my back and can pretty much do what I please within mid-upper-class living. Really not much to complain about.
So why do I feel so empty about it all and why does it all hit me in the morning?
Are the mornings telling me something? Am I where I need to be life when I am not excited to wake up and tackle the day? Am I just not getting enough sleep? Do I have my days out of order? Am I thinking about the wrongs things when I wake up?
As my day progresses I usually find myself in a better place mentally, but as of late that better place is just not sad or anxious, it is really nothing. It is like I am out on a mission to complete all the tasks that I must complete and then the day ends ad I find myself waking up in a very groundhog day state of affairs.
I think there is a piece of me that needs to build a life for myself, kind of like a hobby but on a bigger scale. Something that does not disturb everything that I have built but gives me more purpose and drive.
I think I know understand why everyone says that I am in a place in my life that is exactly where I should be and where I wanted to be. It’s because I have cleared away so much personal bullshit to give myself a launching pad into my next phase of life.
I guess the only thing I did not account for was how hard it is going to be to figure out what my next phase of life is going to be. I have been locked into working on other people's dreams and goals that I have kind of lost sight of mine and it is still a shit ton of work to keep my current life afloat, but that is nothing more than an excuse.
As I write this I wonder if that is what my morning routine should be, uncovering and working on my personal purpose. I know that once I get going in the morning that it is my most productive and creative time, hence why I block time in my calendar to write here every day now. I know I will get the most honest, truthful, and creative version of myself in the early hours of the morning.
I may be on to something here and I kind of like where it is taking me.
Plans for today is to get someone these thoughts stuck in my head out of that nasty beautiful and work on building out a morning routine to try in the midst of all the chaos of the outside world creeping in.
The big mission for life is to not let the outside world creep in!
I hope you enjoyed the rant.
KW
